Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The Permanent Record

I found myself, the other day, playing the "permanent record" card with Seven.

Sometimes you literally can't believe the things you hear yourself saying to your kids.

She was the Queen of Dawdletown on Tuesday.

I usually try to sneak out in the morning and head to the Y for a little workout before the day gets going. By the time I return (around 7:30), Seven and BioMom are (usually) well on their way toward heading to the car and to their respective destinations (school and work).

Tuesday, however, by 7:30, Seven was still upstairs, in her jammies, reading in the rocker next to our bed despite several reminders from BioMom about school, breakfast, being late, etc.

I took a shower, pointedly not stepping into the fray, thinking that she would face the natural consequences of her actions: being tardy for school.

At 7:40, she had just decided to meander her way down the stairs, apparently unaware of the time-space continuum, a constraint faced by most mortals on this planet.

Me: Do you know that you are most certainly going to be late to school today?

She: (ignores me completely).

Me: Do you know what that will mean?

She: It's no big deal. We just go to the office. Ms. [First-Grade-Teacher] does't care if I'm late!

Me (in the voice of the Peanuts Adults): Bwah Bwah, Bwah Blah Blah PERMANENT RECORD Bwah.

We sent an email to her teacher yesterday asking her to gently remind Seven of the importance of punctuality. She gave her a "homework assignment" to try to get dressed and ready as quickly as possible.

The best laid plans. . . .

She was up at 5:30 and then again at 6:30, ready to get ready. Needless to say, that teacher owes me a double-latte.

Last night our performance-conscious Seven wanted to clarify with me this concept of a "permanent record." You know, the whole, be late now, don't get into good high school, don't get into good college, be miserable-for-life, thing?

She asked: What if I don't get into a good college?

Me: You'll be really happy and have a fantastic life no matter what college you go to and even if you're tardy.

She: Expresses relief.

Tardy, schmardy.


dreamer said...

This is more an overall comment onthe blog rather than on the post; here, you'll find it. Anyway.

Love your blog. I'm supposed to be doing homework and i had to hold my nose in order to hold in my laughter at this paragraph:

""Ball!" (emphatically) remains your most prominant word. It is almost to the point now, that I believe you've started your own religion around the spherical deity. BioMom told me today that you were taking one of your balls for a ride around the living room on your trike."

Especially that last line. I did an actual double-take! As a guy, the double-entendre there just kills me. I cant help but quietly smirk and snort as i write this.

Yeah. So, love the blog. I'll be back, in the words of the Governator.

giddings said...

Hi Dreamer --
just to tell you what 'not a guy' I am, I didn't even recognize the double-entendre. And I don't think Big did either...