Subtitle: Why the FYO will need therapy to deal with all of the controlling women in her life
Scene: videotape of the FYO sitting in front of Grandma's store-bought chocolate cake with five burning crayola-look-a-like candles.
Grandma: Are you ready for the singing?
FYO, barely audible: uh huh.
All: Audible deep breath. . . Happy birthday to you. . .
FYO: Gets a VERY serious look on her face.
All: Happy birtday TO YOU.
FYO: Abruptly brings up pointer finger toward one of the candles. Closer. . . Closer.
BioMom, during the downbeat of the song: DON'T TOUCH!
FYO, rushing to explain herself, still during the downbeat of the song: I was just. .
All: Happy birthday . . .
Grandma: Look up here at the camera!
FYO, looking up: All smiles and singing, now, with the group to herself.
All: Dear [FYO]. Happy birthday to you!
Grandma: WOO WOO WOO WOO WOO!
BioMom: Can you blow 'em out?
FYO, collecting herself and preparing to blow: Blows, but none go out.
Grandma: Harder!
BioMom: HARDER!
FYO: Blows again, but this time only 4/5 go out.
Grandma: Whoa! ONE MORE!
Friday, March 11, 2005
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