A friend of mine was out on a date last week. The date is a very candid physician and so they find themselves in strange but remarkably forward conversations.
Friend: Can I ask you a personal question?
Friend: Do you do pap smears and everying?
Dr.Dude: Sure. Can I ask you a personal question?
Dr.Dude: Do you maintain?
Me to Friend: What the eff does "maintain" mean?
I can just imagine the Match.Com ad:
GWM seeking GWM for casual dataing. I'm looking for an honest person who enjoys long walks and old movies, maintains, and loves Dostoevsky.